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Rhode Island Computer Crimes in RI Divorces? Absolutely!

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Whether you like it or not Rhode Island Divorces with bitter spouses are no longer simple anymore.  They have risen to the level of cyber terrorism yet the law has yet to catch up with it in the area of Rhode Island Family Law.  Only criminal law seems to have reached the area of computer crime and infiltration of private information.  Here is only one example of what computer hackers are capable of.

Privacy is no longer something to be considered sacred anymore and some parties in a divorce have taken matters to new heights, going so far as infecting computers with hidden software programs that go virtually unnoticed by the user while the spouse is constantly fed your private information.

Imagine being in a Rhode Island divorce proceeding only to have your private emails and banking records thrown at your own attorney in the courtroom hallway. 

Imagine having your account at BANK RI drained of funds by a transfer you never authorized.

Imagine having fraudulent information published on your Facebook page to be used against you in your divorce when they were planted by your spouse who has stooped to a new low in guerilla divorce tactics.

These are only a few of the actions that spouses have taken or could take to cripple you in a divorce proceeding whether they contain accurate information or fraudulent information.

Denial is usually the first level a spouse will arrive at if these things are even mentioned, yet the reality of the things are that people who can do these things are readily available through the internet or through internet contacts.  Sadly there are even companies that sell little known programs that will do some very damaging and intrusive things to you in your RI Divorce proceeding without having the slightest amount of computer knowledge at all.

In the end, depending upon how the person engaged by your spouse approaches the situation, or which spouse performs the actions, or which spouse even "owns" the computer, the spouse taking these denigrating acts of violation or hires a person to do so may have committed a state or federal computer crime punishable by fines or jail time.  Yet many spouses, especially those with children, bank on the very fact that the spouse begin victimized by these computer invasions of privacy would never cause the mother or the father of their children to be labeled as a criminal.

Ultimately, if you have a computer, especially one connected to the internet by a cable or DSL internet service your level of awareness during a divorce should be increased as should that of your divorce lawyer. 

Yes, Rhode Island divorces could (and frankly have) become subject to criminal acts out of everything from emotion, to vengeance to extreme acts of protection which may be, in fact, criminal.

Watch your back!  Watch your front!  Watch your kids!  But be ever vigilant that your computer may be used to watch YOU!

Not every Rhode Island divorce requires each party, or either party to hire a Rhode Island divorce lawyer to represent them.

I've thought about this divorce concept for more than five (5) years now.  Every week I get calls about Rhode Island divorces.  Most of the time people are shopping to either free advice or an attorneys' rate for a simple uncontested Rhode Island divorce.

Why is that?  It's because money is the big issue with people these days and it doesn't take a Rhode Island lawyer to know that an uncontested divorce is going to cost less than a contested or bitter divorce.  So people just use their common sense and ask for the rate for a simple, uncontested divorce even if they really don't understand what it means for a divorce to be truly "uncontested."

But is asking for a Rhode Island lawyer's rate for their divorce as a simple or uncontested divorce just about the money?  Possibly not.

Some attorneys in Rhode Island find this kind of phone lawyer shopping offensive.  I can understand that.  After all, divorces aren't a one size fits all thing.  Or at least they shouldn't be.  After all, since no two people are EXACTLY alike in the world then it makes sense that now two divorces which involve two people are never EXACTLY alike, right?  Isn't it only common sense?  

Yet let's remove the Rhode Island divorce cost factor from the picture.  Let's assume it doesn't exist at all.  What is another reason for asking any question about a simple, uncontested or amicable Rhode Island divorce?  Could it be because the person wants to be amicable, or simple, or uncontested?  Sure.

So imagine you are an attorney.  A person calls you with questions about a simple, amicable, uncontested Rhode Island divorce.  If you leave out the cost of the divorce, you might actually have a person on the phone who wants to be amicable and not have a contested divorce.  Consider it for a moment.

You are an attorney and you may now have 1/2 of the divorcing couple in a friendly position who wants to be agreeable and resolve the divorce.  Is it possible that basically 50% of the job of getting to friendly/nominal divorce hearing is already present?  It is absolutely possible.  In fact, if the person doesn't have that much money and he or she is attorney shopping for the most affordable lawyer on an amicable Rhode Island divorce, doesn't it make sense that the cost factor is also pushing the person to be amicable and keep the divorce uncontested? It not only makes sense, it is highly probable.

So why do I see our Rhode Island Family Court divorce calendars filled with cases that people aren't resolving by the Friendly Court Hearing Date (aka Nominal Hearing Date)?

I've watched and considered this interesting Rhode Island divorce phenomenon for over a year now. Now while I do represent people with more complicated cases, I coach even more people to manage their own divorces, represent themselves, work out agreements with their own spouses, and even co-parent better.

There are two factors I have identified.  

One factor is when one spouse who can't or won't come to terms with a divorce.  This could be due to the spouse being unreasonable, mental health issues, or pure bitterness and anger.  

The other factor is the involvement of one or more attorneys involved in the case who create conflict in the divorce sometimes knowingly, sometimes unknowingly. 

To be sure divorces can be emotional.  They are too susceptible of tipping from a simple uncontested divorce to a contested, drawn out divorce.  Too much of it is seen these days.  Some days it literally pervades the atmosphere in the courtroom.

In short, I created coaching to help people and not to put anything even remotely amounting to a substantial amount of money in my pocket.  Certainly I'm no saint, I still have to charge for what I do or frankly I won't be eating or I'll be freezing during the winter.

Yet, divorce in our economy right now appears to be on the rise and while I certainly won't profess that in any way I stop it from happening, I felt I had to do something with my skills to make it easier.

So Rhode Island Divorce Coaching was created by me as a solo practicing Rhode Island lawyer.  I focus my entire practice on divorce and family law but I will certainly tell you that my mother raised me well.  She raised me to help others when I can, to fight against what's wrong without violence, and to do what is right when I can.

So here I am doing what I can. I'm not in a position to represent people or coach for free but I'm doing what I can.  When people come to me for representation I may do so, but if I feel that there is any chance that they can properly make it through their divorce using my coaching sessions, then I explain the difference and recommend the coaching when appropriate.

One Rhode Island Divorce Coaching session is only $135.  I provide a full hour of time.  During your session I learn about you, your marriage, your family, your assets, your debts, your income, your education and factors in your family that may be considered in a divorce.  I also the take time to explain to you important aspects of Rhode Island Divorce Process and it's Procedures, important Rhode Island Divorce laws (aka RI Domestic Relations Laws); uncontested divorce proceedings, contested divorce proceedings, the different things the Family Court will want to hear about and what you should discuss with your spouse and answers to your most important questions and concerns.  Lastly, I help you determine whether you truly need a lawyer to represent you or not and discover what might work best for you based upon your personality and what we have discussed during our confidential coaching session.

That's quite a bit to cover for only $135.  One kind woman came to me for a single session after going through three (3) lawyers, over an eight (8) month period of time to the tune of about $7,500 and had this nice statement to make about my service.

"I wish I had found you sooner Chris.  It's sad to find out that what I learned from you in one hour was more than I learned from all my the other attorneys I hired for the past 8 months."  

This was perhaps the best unsolicited testimonial I could have ever received.  For sake of confidentiality and privacy I do not reveal the names of my clients with testimonials because I work with them in the background and I respect their privacy.  However, I can state without hesitation that this is a verbatim quote from an actual client.

Many clients have represented similar sentiments, compliments and testimonials.  

Imagine how much help I can be to you and the damage I might prevent if you met with me just one time.  Isn't it worth $135.00 to be informed about what happens, be prepared for what might come, and peal away the veil of mystery that causes the fear and anxiety associated with divorce proceedings.

I'm just a call away and I look forward to helping you! 


Authored By:

Christopher A. Pearsall, Attorney-at-Law

Rhode Island's Full-Time Divorce* Lawyer is Now
Rhode Island's Only Divorce and Family Law Coach
!!

Discover the Tremendous Benefits You Receive by 

Participating in Family Law Coaching Sessions!

Visit the RhodeIslandDivorceCoach.com

Call (401) 632-6976 Now
to
Schedule Your Low-Cost Rhode Island Divorce* or Family Law* Coaching Session!

Experience the Difference!

Copyright 2000 to Present.  Christopher A. Pearsall, Esquire
 Offering Rhode Island Rhode Island Divorce and Family Law Coaching for a New Millenium!

Note: If this article contains a case scenario with names, dates or amounts, any resemblance any connection to any person or situation now or previously existing is purely accidental, unintentional, and is merely a mistaken creation in the mind of the reader.

* The Rhode Island Supreme Court licenses all attorneys in the general practice of law.  The court does not license or certify any lawyer as an expert or specialist in any particular field of practice.

- - Recommended Websites - -

Pearsall.net | AttorneyPearsall.com | Rhode Island Divorce Tips | ChristopherPearsall.com | GuaranteedWealth.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorney | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer | ChrisPearsall.com | LegalScholar.com | Pearsall-Law-Associates.comRhode Island Divorce Attorneys | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyers | Rhode Island Divorce Coach  |  RI Divorce Coach | RI Divorce Lawyer on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Coach on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer on Facebook.com| Attorney Chris Pearsall at LawGuru.com | Rhode Island Family Law Lawyer - RI Consumer Tips

Too many divorces result from one or more major factors.   Whether you suspect a divorce is imminent in your marriage or not, one factor that keeps most marriages together is "Listening."

Many divorces result from numerous factors.  However, female clients report mostly circumstances which show that their husbands failed to truly "listen to them."

While it may be true that it's a big jump for the lack of listening to cause a divorce because a man failed to listen, many men don't understand that listening is crucial for relationships, especially good marriages.

Keep in mind that listening doesn't involve merely being present and have two ears men.  If you think you're doing your job by just doing those two things, the likelihood is that you could be throwing your relationship with your wife right out the door because you remain ignorant of what it means to "Listen" to your wife.

You may take this for what it's worth, but I have a fantastic relationship with my wife Cindy.  The biggest factor is that I strive to "listen" more than I talk AND to do it properly.

So what is your quick tip?  Listen to your wife and do it properly!  Most therapeutic professionals do it all the time.  It is usually referred to as "Active Listening."

So how do you listen properly?  Follow these factors for listening and you are on your way:

1.  Be attentive when your wife is speaking to you by avoiding doing other things and give your wife your full and complete attention.

2.  Make eye contact and give acknowledgment.  If you sitting in silence and say nothing,  look bored, look in another direction, peek at your watch, don't make eye contact, don't make any sounds and don't even look like you are the slightest bit interested in what she is saying to you then you are blowing it!  

3.  Be attentive for as long as your wife needs to talk.  Why?  Because for the most part I have learned that spouses need to talk in order to feel better or to share with their spouse what is going on inside them.  It is only once you do this completely that your wife feels as though you "listened" to her.  It is only then that she feels as though you truly heard heard her. 

4.  Acknowledge your wife even if it is in small ways such as statements such as "You are kidding me." or , "That's awful." or, head knods or shaking your head or widening your eyes in disbelief.  Your wife needs to know you are not only listening but that you have heard her and this shows her how much SHE MATTERS to you!  

5.  Don't interrupt your wife even if it sounds to you as though you are being accused of something.

6.  Don't get defensive so that all you want to do is refute what she has to say.  Your wife is telling you how she is feeling at that moment.  She needs to be listened to and she needs to be heard.  Men are very literal and we get offended too easily.  Often times a woman might say something that means one thing to her but when taken literally means something totally different to you as a man and husband.  You as the husband need not have enough self control to listen and do so actively.  It may take you extra effort not to feel offended or blamed in your marriage, but reacting and responding before your wife has had a chance to finish may only lead to disaster and divorce.

Keep in mind, if you don't actively listen to her attentively without interruption, judgment, retort, attacking her, defending yourself or allowing her to finish, then you have "blown it."  You need to actively listen from beginning to end for her to feel listened to.

I still "screw up" several times per month and interrupt, get defensive, fail to listen actively and respond appropriately to my wife.  It is during those times that our relationship is angry and uncomfortable and I feel distant from my wife who is also my best friend.  It is during those time that I feel most alone as a husband.  It is far from a good feeling if you truly love your wife as I do.

Chances are I will never be perfect at this, but I get better each month and after 12 years I am truly "in love with my wife" as if it were our very first day together.

Can women do things as well?  Absolutely!  But that is a marriage saving article for another day.

If you truly love your wife, care about your marriage, and don't want to end up in divorce fellow men then I hope you take this article to heart.  For all the divorces I've helped to complete because it was just too late, I hope I can help as many marriages survive.



Authored By:

Christopher A. Pearsall, Attorney-at-Law

Rhode Island's Full-Time Divorce* Lawyer is Now
Rhode Island's Only Divorce and Family Law Coach
!!

Discover the Tremendous Benefits You Receive by 

Participating in Family Law Coaching Sessions!

Visit the RhodeIslandDivorceCoach.com

Call (401) 632-6976 Now
to
Schedule Your Low-Cost Rhode Island Divorce* or Family Law* Coaching Session!

Experience the Difference!

Copyright 2000 to Present.  Christopher A. Pearsall, Esquire
 Offering Rhode Island Rhode Island Divorce and Family Law Coaching for a New Millenium!

Note: If this article contains a case scenario with names, dates or amounts, any resemblance any connection to any person or situation now or previously existing is purely accidental, unintentional, and is merely a mistaken creation in the mind of the reader.

* The Rhode Island Supreme Court licenses all attorneys in the general practice of law.  The court does not license or certify any lawyer as an expert or specialist in any particular field of practice.

- - Recommended Websites - -

Pearsall.net | AttorneyPearsall.com | Rhode Island Divorce Tips | ChristopherPearsall.com | GuaranteedWealth.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorney | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer | ChrisPearsall.com | LegalScholar.com | Pearsall-Law-Associates.comRhode Island Divorce Attorneys | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyers | Rhode Island Divorce Coach  |  RI Divorce Coach | RI Divorce Lawyer on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Coach on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer on Facebook.com| Attorney Chris Pearsall at LawGuru.com | Rhode Island Family Law Lawyer - RI Consumer Tips

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